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Don’t Read Till After. Four Days Too Many
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As teens we are taught that sex is bad. Don’t do it. You will get genital diseases and pregnant. It will ruin your life. Yet, our biological needs win out and we lose our virginity. Some first times are better than others but we try again. Those first few experiences have a lot of impact on how we view sex until something or rather someone comes along to change it.
My younger self was horny. I have no idea what I was doing but I was having fun figuring it out. I didn’t always make the best decision but I learned from my mistakes. I was perplexed that my emotional feelings had little to do with whom my body wanted to sleep with. I guess I’m just hardwired differently. Before my husband I was mostly a normal young woman sexually. I was in a long-term relationship with my fourth boyfriend ever and was debating marriage after college.
Tracci turned my world upside down by showing me I did not have to conform to society’s standard of sex. I could enjoy sex with more than one person and have a meaningful relationship. I might have gone a little wild exploring my sexual appetites. You never know what you like until you try it. I released my desire for other women and have had a girlfriend for a short time.
The funny thing about sleeping with other people is you learn new tricks. Everyone has had different experiences and brings different skills to the table. My best oral partner was not my best sex partner who was not my best fuck buddy. Some connections would last months and turn into friendships. Many others would fizzle out after a few weeks. Most were a product of a long night of flirting that led to great sex but the repeat more often than not fell far short.
I’m not sure how I would have ever made the sexual discovers I have without an open relationship. Our shared and separate sexual experiences have positively influenced our sex life together.
New Release!! Don’t Read Till After… Anthology 2
Don’t Read Till After… is a series of short adult stories from the sexually adventurous lives and minds of Ena and Tracci Howds. Anthology 2 includes the sexy short stories ‘You Show Me Yours, I Will Show You Mine’ ,’Caught’, ‘New Friends’, and ‘The Night Time Ride’.
When I was in boot camp we weren’t allowed phones, text messages or even email. Only traditional letters were allowed once a week. One night feeling needy and horny I wrote Ena a letter; near the end of the letter I wrote one sentence across the page.
“Don’t Read Till After…” Implying not to read until after she was alone and could enjoy it fully.
Then I wrote a few naughty lines of what I wanted to do to her. Knowing it would be weeks until I really could.
They weren’t anything poetic or grand but they were a start.
Ena and I had only been married a few months before I went into the Military. Before getting married we had only met a year before while in college. We knew we wanted to be together, we just hadn’t known anything about each other. A week later I received Ena’s return letter and sure enough buried inside the pages was a reply “Don’t Read Till After…”. Years later I couldn’t tell you which was the first I read but each week I’d get a new story each naughtier and longer then the last, now I have stacks of letters hidden away in a shoe box. What was most interesting was it started an open communication of desire between us.
Unlike the constant fear when you say something to someone’s face they might reject your idea as gross or disturbing or worse. Writing allowed us to express our darker desires that we were possibly ashamed of while allowing us to discuss them. Bondage, anal sex, group sex, and much more.. each a taboo in their own might have taken years of marriage to allow us to even open up about, instead we covered them in the first few months of marriage. Which in turn allowed us to experiment when we were together next. And experiment, and experiment….
For years we talked about publishing our Don’t Read Till After… series planning to make them into real books and share. When we discovered Kindle Direct Publish we found our chance. As I write this we have 8 stories published and a dozen more being edited. All in hope that one day we could help at least one couple to honestly and openly communicate about their own desires.
by Ena Howds
Double standards for man and women have existed as long as the human race. Double sexual standards probably just as long. In certain periods of history it was understood that the man would take a mistress and the wife would take care of the home and the children. In different regions husbands also looked the other way when their wife had an affair while in others the woman was stoned. Whether for cultural, religious, or society norms, extramarital affairs are received with mixed but usually negative reactions.
When I try to explain that I am in an open marriage, I feel like I am automatically placed with the label slut. Where my husband is received with congratulations on having an awesome wife, I am cornered with concerned looks of why would you agree to that? When I say I enjoy our open relationship I am placed in two catorgiories; in denial or a shameful slut.
What does it mean to be husband and wife? Many questions tend to pop up when anyone brings up open marriage. One such question is why get married in the first place if you want to keep seeing other people? The answer for me is easy. I love my husband and want him to be a big part of the rest of my life. I beam when I think of him as my husband and my heart leaps when I see him playing with our children. He is mine and I am his. We just happen to enjoy also sleeping with other people. Our marriage is perfect for us because it takes all of our wants, needs, desires, and feelings into account.
We have talked about possible outcomes of our open marriage. Sometimes playing for us is swinging no emotional attachment and only sex. Other times we are looking for more of friends with benefits. Singles or couples we could have fun with in and out of the bedroom with emotional feelings but not love. The possibility of adding a girlfriend or boyfriend individually or as a couple exist but we have yet to meet anyone we wanted to place those labels on. With every path we pursue we will do so together as husband and wife.
by Ena Howds
For the Chris Murray Report and the Philadelphia Sunday Sun
After being picked in the seventh round of the 2014 NFL Draft, 2013 Southeastern Conference Defensive Player of the Year, Michael Sam shares a kiss with his lover, Vito Commisano on camera. The video caused a social media firestorm.
PHILADELPHIA—In a television special on NBC in 1968, Harry Belafonte and white British pop singer Petula Clark performed an anti-war duet—“Path to Glory”.
During the course of the performance, Clark touched Belafonte’s arm.
A white account executive from Chrysler, the sponsor of the show, demanded that the segment be deleted from the special before it aired not only because it would offend viewers from the South, but because it offended the account executive’s racial sensibilities as well. He wanted it replaced with video that showed Belafonte and Clark performing the song, but standing apart.
But Clark and her…
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Men are not more sexual then women. We just express it differently. Mr. Wilcox states that because the percentages of reported unfaithfulness are higher in men then women would be the cause of discomfort for woman in an open marriage. I tend to disagree. First off the statistic is skewed in favor of men for one reason. Opportunity. According to the Department of Labor (http://www.dol.gov/wb/stats/main.htm) 40% of women are stay at home housewives. These woman by de facto of their day to day activities are exposed to less opportunity of a new sexual partner. And if they do meet someone that gets them all hot and bothered, its a one time meeting and most people usually dont sleep with strangers on the first meeting, especially when your being dragged by two kids. Where as those in the workforce are consistently exposed to opportunities for interaction and flirtation. Which builds on the lust, while breaking down on reasons to not to have an affair. Even women who work, a majority of them are solely responsible for the housework, a full time job in itself. There just isnt enough time for a mister(male mistress?).
A society that would become accepting of open marriages would find a surplus of couples discussing the idea BEFORE marriage. Which would lead to those couples who are interested in the idea and those not. People would simply find a better match. We would also find couples who choose to not follow that path and be monogamous. I have a female bi-sexual friend, who married a heterosexual man. Her husband and her discussed while datIng their sexual interests. And he was adamant that if they were to move forward with their relationship, she would have to give up women. I asked her how she will deal with not being with women. Her reply “He means more to me then all the women in the world.” She has been happily married for 3 years now.
Everything has a beginning. Ours started in College. Ena and I met while I was dating Megan, Ena’s roommate, during my senior year. One night Megan decided her and I should go to the strip club. I knew that Megan was bisexual and if we brought another bisexual girl my chances of a threesome would be possible. Sadly my other bisexual friend wasn’t able to come. Megan said that Ena could join us. What I didn’t expect was that she was crazier than both of Megan and I.