An introvert in an open world.

I know it is seems weird but I’m a total introvert. I can spend days hanging out with myself; reading, writing, going for walks, and even out to eat solo.

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I despise going to the bathroom with a group of girls. Thanks, I can pee all by myself. No offense to those that enjoy the group bathroom experience, but I don’t get it. I feel like I’m totally missing some woman secret that no one has let me in on. Continue reading An introvert in an open world.

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Cheating Versus Open Marriages

 

Article – http://www.nytimes.com/roomfordebate/2012/01/20/the-gingrich-question-cheating-vs-open-marriage/couples-should-negotiate-their-marriage-vows

Questions:

If more couples considered monogamy optional, would divorce and cheating be less common, and unmarried cohabitation less attractive?

What if it were compulsory to write a personalized marriage contract with your spouse, tailored to your own circumstances?

Replacing today’s default marriage vows with compulsory personal contracts would create the space for two adults to seriously and soberly sit down and decide what it is that they want from married life. Continue reading Cheating Versus Open Marriages

Tracci’s Superpower

For a few years I really felt as if I had some passive supernatural ability for finding sexual deviants. I used to refer to it as being a Deviant Magnet. No matter where I was or what I was doing as if by fate, I would bump into some special person. I would start talking with the one other person in the room who was as sexual and open as I was.

One of my favorite stories was hopping on a train to go see Ena while we were still just dating. I happened to discover I was in the “Reserved for Parties of Two or More” section of the train. I turned around to the complete stranger behind me and asked him if he wanted to be my party of two. He chuckled and said sure. We spent the next hour or so talking about the normal stuff, when one of us slipped that we were in an open relationship. And BOOM! The cover was blown off. we spent the next few hours talking about dozens of highly inappropriate topics for public discussion.

Here are the short notes; Him and his wife had been married for three years at that point, been open for the last two. They were both bisexual both very open sexually, they had done the orgies and the sex shows they even had a sex swing in THEIR LIVING ROOM!!

How do I find these people?! Two words – Deviant Magnet

But wait there is more. While still on the train we decide to go to the bar area, we get down there and there is only one person. So being friendly we sit down next to her and start to converse. No clue how it jumps to the topic but she is a Mexican Porn star. Yes, I totally watched her videos, her specialty… extra big cock like the 11-13 inches or obnoxiously thick kind of extra big. The train ride was exciting and a lot of fun. Nothing sexual happened but still a great time.

Another example is my wife Ena. We met at a small private religious college, neither of us are religious. This pillar of education is where I met a 22-year-old girl and did not know it was physically possible for girls to masturbate!! Reread that sentence. She did not know she could pleasure herself. Not only had she never touched herself, she didn’t know she could! As a guy who started knowingly playing way, way too young my mind was blown. At this same university I met Ena. Who on the outside plays the perfect role of farmer’s daughter meets innocent schoolgirl and yet is a freak in all the best ways.

I have dozens of occasions in my life where I have met that one deviant or so I thought. When Ena and I started looking for swingers and polys and open marriages, and even an occasional unicorn. We expected to find almost nothing or the one older couple who were eccentric and into drugs and far from normal. What we did find was quite the opposite. We found a little bit of everything. Just as you find a little bit of everything, at school and work and church or in the military. The introverts and the extroverts, the rich and less rich, the stable and oh so unstable. Those couples that are looking to solve their marriage and some that are trying to find a reason to end it.

We also found a lot more people than we ever expected. Everyday Craigslist is flooded with ads of couples and singles wanting to try threesomes and moresomes. Apps like Tinder and OKCupid and websites dedicated to No Strings Attached Sex and Friendfinding not to mention all the blogs and discussion boards. WordPress is a perfect example of the how many people are interested in some sort of sexual deviants.

I once thought of myself as a Deviant Magnet… but I don’t anymore, I realized that everybody is a freak in their own way. You just have to bump into them and start talking.

-Tracci

Our ordinary lives in an open marriage

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